Life Lately.

I've been MIA for a while. I'm no good at blogging. Never have been and probably never will be. Ha. But every now and then I decide to write about life and how it's treating me. 

So, lately, it's been a bit crazy. Exciting. Fun. 

I started working outside of our home last week and boy has it been a challenge. I've been looking for employment since August (when both my kids entered school) and I haven't had any luck. Employers don't really understand, "I haven't worked in four years because I've chosen to stay home and raise my kids." thing. They want recent experience. And when cleaning bathrooms, cooking food, and tending to kids isn't part of the job description, they don't really care. 

Well, I was lucky enough to stumble across a job description that said "Looking for a reliable, hard-working, honest individual to work in our law office" I decided OH!!! I could do that! The day it was posted I filled out the application, a week later I had an interview, and two days later I started work! (I think they felt sorry for me, ha) It's been a blessing. I was starting to talk to my friends on Good Morning America like they were in my living room, I was going a bit nutty being home alone. So the past week has been a bit of an adjustment for me, that husband, and the kids, but everyone is taking it well!!! ;) 

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We've also celebrated our Risen Savior. Wow! What an exciting time of year! I told you guys for Lent one of my goals was to walk around my neighborhood praying. Well, I tell you, what a blessing! During my time I was able to pray with people I've never actually talked to! They know that if they need prayer all they have to do is ask! 

Happy Easter!!! 

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Oh!! And Spring has FINALLY arrived in Mississippi!!! Yay!!! So we've been spending as  much time outside as possible!!! We were definitely lacking Vitamin C! Ha! So Easter weekend we went to New Orleans (three hours away) and we went on a swamp ride and visited the zoo. Yesterday, the kids enjoyed the slip-n-slide and cold treats. It's been a blast!! I loooove warm weather! 

Now we are embracing for three days of bad weather! Blaaah!!! 

Tired. Weak. Broken.

My husband's  birthday was at the end of last month, and I failed. I failed terribly. 

Normally the kids and I would bake him his favorite brownies, attack him with silly string as he walked in from a busy day of work, and give him cute gifts that reflect what he means to us. 

Did I mention, I failed? 

His birthday was on Saturday this year. The day before I spent ALL day volunteering at my daughter's school (I thought it was the following week) and then she had a late DR's appointment to make sure she is meeting all those "developmental" milestones. By the time we got done with all that Friday was almost over and I had not planned anything for my sweetie. 

Saturday, his birthday, we woke up to soccer games, and headed to his mom's three hours away to celebrate. I still hadn't done anything. 

You see, I'm all about making people feel special for every.single.holiday. Birthday, check. Easter, check, Valentines, check. Grandparents day, check. I'm always pouring myself into everyone, for everything. 

I broke down, told him how truly sorry I was that I let time slip away. He knew. He offered grace. He knows I stretch myself to far, and I expect to much from me.

You see, I care for my husband. I try to meet his every need, want, desire. 

I care for my kids. I try to be the best mom possible. I want them to know they are loved and cherished.

I take a lot of care of my elderly grandma. Who last July was diagnosed with kidney failure and is on dialysis three days a week. I pick her up from treatments. She's weak. She's been fighting a long hard battle for over 15 years now with cancer. She's on countless amounts of meds. She can't care for herself. So I pour a lot of my time into her. 

I try to keep the house clean, food cooked, and clothes washed. I try to attend all sports. I volunteer. I'm a "yes" person when anyone asks a favor or needs my time/help, I am there.

J-O-Y

J-O-Y

This must surely mean

 Jesus first, yourself last, and other's in between.

 I strive to do that every.single.day.

But, I'm tired. 
I'm weak. 
I'm broken. 
My sacrifice is failing. 

 
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But Jesus didn't fail when He sacrificed his life for me. He could have changed His mind and not bore my sin on the Cross, but he didn't, He prevailed. 

So, I cling to that. 

I cling to His sacrifice and His grace. 

I cling to His love and peace. 

The way I sacrifice myself for others, is a blessing. It's my calling. It's a privilege and a honor. Though I'm weak and tired. I know I have a foundation that can not be shaken. I will prevail.